To online date or not to online date...

That is the question that I have been struggling to answer myself. Since 2003 I have been a serial online dater with absolutely no luck. Not even as much as a semi-serious boyfriend. So taking the advice of my ex-boss (though this advice was for cold calling, not dating) to do the same thing over and over and expect something different is the definition of insanity. That being said, for me to continue to online date with hopes of finding Mr. Right is insane.

I've joined countless dating website over the last 6+ years and I have no recommendation on any. They all seem to lead to the same type of guys. Horny, old, lonely bastards who aren't looking for anything serious, just a “friend.” That's code for "fuck buddy." I have been on enough of these sites to have picked up online dating etiquette so I can read between the lines. Literally. Here are a few tips.

If you strike up a semi-good conversation with a guy and then he asked for more pictures of you, cut him off. He is only interested in sex and not serious at all about a relationship. On top of that, he's a jerk because he's judging you on your appearance and doesn’t have much interest in getting to know you.

If a guy sends you a mail that's long and it has a bunch of errors, mark his illiterate ass down and walk away. Yeah, sure we all have typos or make one or two mistakes, but when there are several mistakes to the point were the guy isn't even making sense or didn't seem to care about what he wrote to proofread it, don’t bother reading it. It's obvious that you are one of many ladies he's mailing and he's just trying to see who will hit back. It's perfectly fine for guys to be into other women beside you, but to not care about what he's saying to you because he’s trying to get a catch, shows he's not gonna care much about if you don’t respond. You want a guy to want you to write him back because they are here to find a date to start a serious relationship.

And be care of the "too good to be true" guys. You know the kind of guy that loves hiking, camping, long walks on the beach. All too cliché for 2009. Seriously, if a guy seems to be saying all the "right" things to you, but you know deep down in your heart he can't be serious, then he's not. A good way to test to see if a guy is being genuine in his response is to ask him deep questions. Ask him about his last relationship, but don't do it in an aggressive way. You gotta be cleaver when it comes to the ex because guys are more sensitive than women when they've been burned. So try to say something like, "what happened to in your last relationship, if you don’t mind talking about it?" If he doesn't give any detail then you know you're dealing with someone who is totally blocking and has his walls are up. You can continue to try to break them down, but ladies be careful. Those walls are hiding something dark and you have to be sure you even want to go there with him. But of course if you’re looking for Mr. Right then you will want to.